2012

I am not doing anything exciting for the new year. In fact, because I will be at work, I'm hoping for quite a mundane night. Exciting is never a good thing in the ICU.

Last night I was on Facebook and kept seeing all these posts about how people are "so done with 2012" and how this was the "worst year ever". I understand that some years are definitely worse than others, but I have a hard time believing that very many people in developed countries had such a bad year that there is nothing good to remember. I feel that when we're so blessed that a failed relationship or bad marks are the worst things in our life we're still doing pretty well. But maybe that's just me.

2012 was a year of ups and downs for me. Lots of tough times, but lots of great times too. This past year I got out of a long-term relationship, crossed the stage to accept my BScN degree, successfully wrote my nursing exams and received my registration, travelled to Vancouver, Seattle, Calgary, Ontario, Taiwan and Malaysia, attended a funeral we all saw coming, made numerous new friends, started my career as an ICU nurse, celebrated my sister's engagement, found a new home, and accepted that my life is changing so fast it makes my head spin. I laughed, cried, fought, compartmentalized,  held grudges, made some stupid decisions, learned, celebrated, forgave, tried new things, let go, loved, and said goodbye. There have been plenty of tears, but tears are not always shed in sadness; tears can fall for heartbreak, sorrow, happiness, surprise, anger, confusion, relief, or they can be simply an expression of letting go.

Letting go. Something I am learning to do. I have some great big dreams for 2013, but I am learning to let things happen the way they happen. I am learning that I have so little control over my life - and thank heavens! I am far too apt to make mistakes. I look forward to the coming year - I will try to embrace the bad with the good, run alongside the change, grow as a woman and a human being, and be thankful for myself, my family and friends, and all the amazing things I am blessed to experience.

It will be a Happy New Year.